i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
