i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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