That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
