She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
