Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
