I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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