you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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