You're completely useless in the revolution.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I smell like Dick and happiness
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
