I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
