im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize