Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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