so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
