You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Dick very happy bro
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
