that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize