i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
