He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize