Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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