You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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