You're completely useless in the revolution.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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