Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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