Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
