New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
