...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
