Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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