hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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