So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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