Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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