So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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