You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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