Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize