We won't sleep together?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize