Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
how drunk are you?
Several
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
