I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
