I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
