ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
