Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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