He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
