Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize