So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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