in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
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