CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i dont even know how to be here
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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