yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
it's like iHOP with fire
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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