i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
