Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
