Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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