Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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