Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
