Screwed.edu
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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