We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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