What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
