Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
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this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
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I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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