no one should ever give us hovercrafts
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Let's get the cat blown out
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize